I am no priest or religious leader, begging you to be nice after the ceremony and stay away from sin. I am a scientist and like you a human being, wanting to know the truth about who I am by nature, or who we are as inhabitants of this big 7 billion people’s society of humans.
Brainwashed negativity towards human nature
Don’t read newspapers or watch the news to figure it out. Here man is an awful, vindictive, hateful, violent, murderous, war ridden little devil with an innocent face. That perspective is much skewed, and dangerously self fulfilling, as we start to believe in it, act from it, fear one another by it, and shoot at each other because of it. Neither seek desperate refuge in the opposite naive stance of flower power and pureness of the soul alternatives! Both views might be right to some extent, but only under certain circumstances I soon want to describe.
Lets do some small research on this matter
Before I follow this tread further, however, I want you to mark my following words and take this challenge: Be a scientific researcher for a day or two, and check out what happens. Find out what happens inside your body and mind when you do something good to a person: A person giving comfort to a very sad man
That is, when you help somebody you figure out need some help, small or big. When you praise or acknowledge somebody for what they are or do. Or you just give a compliment to a person who looks gorgeous or seems nice. A compliment you would not usually have given because you would feel embarrassed or be thought of as a person with a hidden motive or inclined to inappropriate flirting.
Observe with a gentle touch how the person you give attention or help react. Mind his or her facial expression, their thankfulness, or their sudden astonishment. But never lie, find something you really mean when you give a compliment, or help other people with something you yourself would find very helpful.
A man giving a poor woman his slippers in Rio de Janeiro
Doing it together
If you are in a group that reads this or take this challenge together, try not to think of it as unnatural, or artificial. Truth to tell, being good to other people, giving compliments, showing interest in them and also hugging, that is very natural. It also releases hormones in your brain and body that are very healthy. A Norwegian young man rescue a lamb from drowning , while another man helps them up on land.
Besides there is a psychological reason for a natural good feeling when acting this way. That is because our self is developed and derived from the contact with the other, and cannot really be separated from this other, without loosing one leg to walk with or stand on in life
. No reason to be shy or a gay bystander in order to give an outed brave man a hug.
The self as a part of the other, and vice versa
With our mirror neurons in the brain not far behind our eyes, – making people feel good, thankful or happy, triggers similar feelings in the giver’s brain and psyche as in the receiver’s. A guatemalean girl gives flowers to a nice tourist
Passing it forward to at least two people.
Try to pass this goodness or acts of benevolence forward to at least to persons a day. In a short while these small ripples on the surface might build up to a bigger wave of good will and benevolent actions.
In the meantime I will add up some scientific research on why this exercise in practicing goodness is the right thing to do. I addition it is absolutely in accordance with the answer on the question of who we are by nature. This will soon be added here.
Good Luck with your exercise!
Kevin Spacey and Haley Joel Olment in the film, “Pay it Forward”
Don’t forget to be equally good to yourself after checking out the post-exercise reactions!